ERUKU: THE URBAN MONKEY 2.

ERUKU, The Urban Monkey.
Series 2.
Hey there, I’m here again and this
series continues. My urban monkey of
a friend is at it again. But this time, i
don’t think he was the one that stirred
up the trouble as usual, maybe i gave
him a little help.
Eruku was at a game centre on this
very cool Friday night, playing Play-
Station II and using his favourite team,
Manchester United. Eruku was having
so much fun at the console and he
was simply fumbling to whoever was
playing with him that night all in the
spirit of the game.
Then i was passing by the game centre
that night and honestly I hadn’t given
much thought to our little incident at
the viewing centre the other day, but
at the moment i felt a sudden rage at
the sight of Eruku’s smiling face in front
of the P.S II console.
My elder brother was with me at that
moment, and he wanted to play game,
so I just told him in brief language,
what happened at the viewing centre.
Unknown to me, Eruku had always
been fumbling to my brother before he
even met me at all. At that moment,
what happened in the viewing centre
started getting clearer to me. Eruku had
seen the striking semblance between
myself and my brother and had figured
out that, since he had a score to settle
with my brother, so it is normal if we
slug it out but then I had declined to
fight.
As I entered the game centre and
pointed Eruku to my brother, Eruku’s
chanting and fumbling subsided, in his
mind he felt that he was definitely in a
deep sh*t, but Eruku would never go
down without a fight. I explained our
little ordeal our little ordeal to my
brother and the other guys that were
inside the viewing centre. Eruku felt
really pissed off at my story and my
seeming reported speech and he game
that he was playing and started
screaming at me.
“ you ehn? You think say na only you
get brother, wey you fit report to abi? ”
he screamed in the traditional broken
English. Eruku was saying that did I
think I was the only one that had a
brother to report to? That accusation
to me felt as if he had stabbed me with
a blunt knife, even though I had no
mind to fight him, but it pissed my
brother off to hear Eruku talk the way
he had spoken and he felt like
breaking his arm or leg. But I totally
held him back, saying that Eruku wasn’t
worth a break of his sweat. But Eruku
just wont stop, even if his body and
mouth wont stop his eye lid kept
twitching as if in disagreement with
what his mouth was saying.
“stupid boy, I will teach you and your
brother a lesson that either of you
would never forget, just wait ehn? Let
me finish my game.”
I really couldn’t believe that Eruku still
had the guts to say the things that he
was saying, especially in the presence
of my elder brother. So I interfered
again to save him from receiving the
beating of his life.
“ i would dare raise a finger against an
idiot like you, you just enjoy raising
hell and when it gets hot enough you
run, if I felt like dealing with you, i
would call boys rather than doing
anything to you myself” . But Eruku
would not subside instead he raised
his skinny fist and started threatening
with it.
“ you are using cultie to threaten me?
Ehen? My brothers are cultists too for
your information. “ now cultism in our
society is not something to flaunt
around. It is something that the whole
society preaches against. That
statement from Eruku invoked a wide
array of laughter from the crowd that
had gathered because they have never
seen or heard someone use the cult
word that way before, it sounded funny
and alien to them. It now seemed as if
Eruku all of a sudden became infamous
and also a stand up comedian or
should i use sit down because he was
on his seat when he uttered the
statement.
At that moment I realised that fighting
with Eruku was pointless and a mere
waste of time that could have been put
to good use. So myself and the other
folks around started gisting about how
it is only a normal thing for an
individual to be a little disrespectful at
a viewing centre. Since the argument
started, there has been a guy in that
game centre too that had some issues
yet unresolved with Eruku, something
like mine but had kept quiet because
he thought he knew Eruku more than
we did.
We just laughed Eruku off to the point
that he got frustrated and embarrassed
that we were laughing at him. Then all
of a sudden, Eruku diverted all of his
anger and frustration on the cool dude,
that had kept to himself since, his
name was Dayo, a three year graduate
of political science from a private
university that is still yet to get a job,
Dayo was also notorious with his
anger.
“ you Dayo! Or what do you call your
name? You have joined them abi?”
Screamed Eruku. At first glance at
Dayo, you might be surprised at how
deceptively lean he looked but he
grabbed Eruku by the collar of his shirt
and lifted him up, high enough to pin
him to the wall and smashed Eruku’s
left chin with a thunderous punch. Oh!
My word even though Eruku was a
total jerk . I felt sorry for him, nobody
interfered and Dayo didn’t follow the
punch up, because Eruku just went
limp and passed out.
After someone threw water on Eruku
to revive him, distortedly and with
bloody lips, he said “ where is the
fool? Let me teach him a lesson he’d
never forget. The funny thing was that,
at that moment the pity that I felt for
him grew into regret and I wished that
I was the one that knocked him out.